Three weeks ago I stepped into the third decade of my life. In the days leading up to my birthday I couldn’t help but reflect on some of the most important and valuable pieces of information I’ve learned in my years on the planet. This list is not in any order of importance, nor is it a complete list of all the valuable things I’ve learned. This is a snapshot of what I feel is most worth sharing with you as I begin my thirtieth year. My hope in writing this is that you might find some encouragement/support/insight/or seeds of hope that you can take into your own life and use for your own benefit. Shall we begin?…
Let yourself fall. Let yourself be overcome by the beauty of the world. Let yourself be mesmerized by the sheer joy found in your own laughter. Let your mind drift to the most beautiful memories, let them swirl around you, bringing a smile to your face. The world is full of serene magic. You need only open your eyes to it. What magic can you see before you? What sweetness can you hear around you? Are the birds singing? Is the wind softly blowing through the trees? Is there a sweet melody flowing in the background? Beauty is there, right in front of you. Do you see it? Can you feel it?
I am a huge advocate for living a life of big, bold adventures and exploring every possibility. A life of unlimited fun, love and joy.
Everyone wants something different in life.
When wading through the ideas and dreams you have in your head and heart, it can feel exhilarating and inspiring, but it can also feel overwhelming at times. So much so that it can bring on a kind of hopeless, deflated feeling because of the pressure of needing to 'want it all'. We constantly see messages of 'more, more, more' and 'bigger, better, faster'. If you want those things, fantastic! Go out and achieve them. I know you can!
What about the times when it feels like the walls are falling down around you? When you can hear the positive vocalizations of well meaning loved ones, but nothing gets in. What then? What about the times when it's not all rainbows and sunshine?
Well my friend, that's when you hang on. You learn to ride the storm. Maybe you don't feel like dancing in the rain, but you convince yourself that the sunshine on the other side of the hurricane is worth gritting your teeth and letting the hail pelt you in the face while you're in the eye of it.
Thoughts on comparison.
There will always be someone smarter. Prettier. Better educated. More attractive. More well adjusted. Luckier. More talented. More vivacious. More bold. More poised. More wild. More important. More confident.
And there will also always be someone with less of all of those things, than you yourself possess.
The point is: It doesn't matter.
Your worth is not based upon how well you perform/look/smell/laugh/speak, compared to someone else.
It doesn’t have to be so hard all the time. You are not required to struggle, toil and stress your way through your life. Culture teaches us otherwise. We are taught that in order to live a happy and full life, in order to be successful and achieve what we want to achieve in life, we must grit our teeth and bear the drudgery that is ‘life’, in the feeble hope that one day, we might actually be happy. Hard work becomes a badge of honour. Sleep deprivation comes with bragging rights. Working for the weekend becomes the norm. No, No, and NO.
Don't let the time pass without experiencing it. Don't let another day pass without feeling the sun on your skin. Without watching the sky with wide eyed wonder. Don't let another day pass without moving your body in joyful motion. Without watching a tree swaying in the wind. Don't let another day pass without feeling joy in your heart. Without looking deeply into the eyes of the one you love.
Sitting across from me with her soft red curls and impossibly warm smile, she asked me, "What do you do that's fun?". My answer was weak, let me tell you. For someone who had recently returned to Canada after having lived in Peru for two years, I couldn't give her a great answer. My answer included things like hanging out with my sisters, playing with my puppy, and road trips. The truth was like a smack in the face. I had let insecurity rule my life for so long, making me afraid to go out and try new things and meet new faces, that in my late twenties, I wasn't living a fun life. I was living a flat life. And that realization brought me to tears.
I invite you to tune in. Pay attention to your thoughts, and the stories streaming through your mind. We are all storytellers. We naturally have the ability and the imagination to string a wild and exciting tale together bit by bit, event by event. We have the ability to captivate and light the spark of imagination in others as we weave our words into stories. With this ability, this natural, ingrained skill, we can also create stories that don't serve us, and might even hurt us.
I dare you to let your imagination run wild.
I dare you to believe in the magic of your existence.
I dare you to breathe deep and feel the energy of life flowing through you.
I dare you to hold on to your dream.
I dare you to create a new dream.
I dare you to buck against anything and everything that has ever told you that you don’t deserve to live exactly how you wish.
For many of us, 2015 presented beautiful and enriching experiences, but it also cracked us open and gave us plenty of challenges. Does this sound about right to you? I’m not an astrologer but it makes me think that there must have been something up with the stars this past year that made so many challenging and character testing scenarios for so many kind hearted, loving people. If any astrologers read this, feel free to weigh in on that last statement!
With the ending of one year and the beginning of another, comes reflection, and often goal setting for the year to come. This is a hugely useful and very wise practice, however it can also become overwhelming and doomed for failure if you don’t set the foundational pieces.
One of the sweetest gifts we can ever receive is the gift of a real, non-polished, raw, and honest friendship. Think of the dear, close friends in your life. Think of the moments of wild laughter, the memories of taking giant leaps together, the times of being each others safety net. They know you, and you know them… not the way other people know you. You see who they truly are, and they know exactly what’s in your heart. These are your kindred friends. Your soul sisters and brothers.
Your dream is more important than the stories you tell yourself as to why you can’t achieve it. Your dream is more important than the activities you waste time doing.
Your dream is more important than:
We all have it. Well, most every human I’ve ever discussed this with, has it: the story you tell yourself as to why you can’t ___________ (fill in the blank). Why you can’t reach your dreams, or better yet, forget about reaching them. The old tape can prevent you from even trying to reach them. It tells you why you can’t have a healthy relationship. Why you can’t live where you want. Why you can’t feel daily happiness. Why you can’t have your favourite pie (just have the damn pie!).
You’re stuck. You feel trapped. Your lungs feel like a vacuum and you suspect that maybe your spirit is being crushed. It’s breaking my heart just to hear it. I want you to know something. I need you to know that this is not it for you. This is not the way it’s meant to be. This is not how it has to be for the rest of your days. This is not how it ends.
It’s gone, and you need it back ASAP! That little sucker is tricky, like a little Jedi/Ninja/Christmas elf. It’s going to take some tenacity to coax it back out of it’s hiding place. There are extreme tales of creatives going to great lengths to retrieve the inspiration that has run away, skipping merrily through the forest on its way to Narnia.
You dear, sweet thing reading this. This is just for you.
I am writing this late at night, after the sun has long gone to bed, and the owls have come out to play with the moon. This is a magic hour. The world outside my window is quiet, and I feel that I can hear just what your heart is saying.
You Are Worthy
So often we tell ourselves stories as to why we can’t, why we shouldn’t, why we aren’t deserving.
This is crap.
The very fact that you are here, on this planet. The fact that you are a breathing, sparkling, beautiful being, is proof that you are worthy.
You are worthy of everything you have ever wanted
