Thoughts on comparison.

There will always be someone smarter. Prettier. Better educated. More attractive. More well adjusted. Luckier. More talented. More vivacious. More bold. More poised. More wild. More important. More confident. 

And there will also always be someone with less of all of those things, than you yourself possess.

The point is: It doesn't matter.

Your worth is not based upon how well you perform/look/smell/laugh/speak, compared to someone else.

You are perfect and magnificent exactly as you. You have a unique blend of talents, skills, knowledge, power, connection, and perspective. You are, in fact, necessary. You are needed. You are required. You are irreplaceable. Get used to it. 

It doesn't matter what Serena down the street is doing, she's working on her own stuff. And so she should be. Bring your attention back to you. Back to your passion. Back to your talents. Back to your heart. 

Comparison is a beast that will consume you, if you let it. It comes strutting in, swinging its hips and right away locks eyes with you, smirking. If you're really lucky, sometimes it brings its little buddy, jealousy, and together, they are powerful enough to ruin your afternoon, your day, your week, maybe even your year. If. You. Let. Them.  

Have you ever felt satisfied by comparing yourself to someone else? Either someone seemingly greater or lesser than yourself? Take a moment to think about it. If you've compared yourself to someone 'greater' than yourself, you're likely left feeling minuscule and deflated. If you've caught yourself comparing yourself to someone seemingly 'lesser' (I'm using that term excessively loosely) than yourself, you likely felt a false sense of self-congratulations for a fraction of a second, followed by a wave of shame, guilt, and or a general sense of wanting to bury your head in the sand.  Amiright? In no way is comparison a happy-feeling-maker. It just isn't! It's crap. And most importantly: it's irrelevant. I implore you to focus on your own worth. Your own creativity. Your own work. Stay on your own trail, the trail that is supportive and loving and truthful about who you really are. Know that you have the power and ability to direct your thinking, and by doing so, change your life. 

Listen, I know it's not easy to pry your mind away from 'but how come she's so lucky?', or the 'maybe if I were a bit more like him, then they would accept me'. NO! You are exactly who you are, for a reason.  The world needs you. YOU. We don't need some half-cooked, mannequin wannabe version of the person you think you need to be. Nope. We need you. The sooner you come to realize that, and accept it, the sooner you can get to know exactly who you are.

Comparison has no practical use. It is of no value to you. So let it go. Recognize that your energy and attention are better spent elsewhere. Get in the habit of safeguarding your thoughts. You are not required to entertain each and every thought that runs through your mind. Create a habit of noticing your comparing thoughts, ask yourself "Does this thought serve me in a positive way?", and if the answer is "No.", throw it out immediately and replace it with a positive thought about your abilities and uniqueness. Get in the habit of redirecting your mental energy to things that serve you and keep you in the flow of positivity. Stop online stalking, stop obsessing, stop letting those poisonous and all consuming ideas steal your time. Realize that you have control over your own thoughts, and redirect your energy into something positive. Something creative. Something that puts good into the world and fills your heart. THAT is worth your energy. That, is worth your precious time. That, is worth waking up for. 

Show us your heart. Show us exactly who you were born to be. We need you now!

xo daphne


Now it's your turn. In the comments below, tell me where you struggle with comparison. And how you plan to re-focus your attention to something more productive and satisfying.

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